Advice from Dr. Kevin Leman

Parenting Advice from Dr. Kevin Leman in Have a New Kid by Friday (Revell, 2008)

Just some tidbits of advice from international Christian speaker, radio personality, and psychologist Dr. Kevin Leman. Most of this advice pertains to parenting OLDER children. So, please consider carefully the ages of your children. If they don’t apply now just tuck these tidbits away for a few years down the road.

About attending your place of worship:

Don’t make a federal case out of it. Simply get ready for church and leave. After church, do one thing different: don’t come home.

About bathing and brushing teeth:

Don’t make a battle out of it. Insist calmly that these are routine daily things. It’s just ‘what we do’ in our family. Don’t cave in.

About bedtime:

Have a bedtime routine and stick with it. Pick it very carefully. Once chosen, it will be difficult to change. Children have a huge arsenal of things to pull out to delay bedtime and to needlessly involve their parents. Calmly stand firm.

About bed wetting:

Research shows that children who wet the bed have deep-sleep patterns. The majority of children will eventually grow out of those patterns and stop wetting the bed. Be patient.

About spending money carelessly:

If your child tends to spend money carelessly, simply let reality be the teacher. Do not rescue them.

About household responsibilities:

Every child will forget every once in a while. When a child forgets don’t make a big deal out of it. But if forgetting becomes a constant thing, you need to do something different to get your child’s attention. The best thing I’ve found is to hit the child financially in the pocketbook. There are no warnings, no threats, no whining, no fighting. Simply pay someone else (or yourself) for doing that task, then deduct the money from the child’s allowance.

About good manners:

If you haven’t taught your children basic manners, it’s never too late to start.
Try playing the “Catch Someone Not Using Good Manners Game.” At the table or anytime it’s fun and gets the point across.

About getting your kids to communicate:

If you want your children to talk to you about anything, don’t ask questions. Instead, get quietly involved in their world. Talk about what they’re interested in—even if it’s not what you’re interested in.

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